It’s a question that provokes some very unpleasant scenes on the internet, actually.

If, hypothetically, a cure for autism existed, would you administer it?

If you would, then you are a “curebie” and you should expect a vehement response for your opinion. Neurodiversity, as the argument goes, is no less a valid principle than racial or gender diversity. Advocate a cure and you are no better than a racist, a chauvinist, or any other bigot.

Except we have to pause for a moment and ask who is proposing this particular opinion, and why?

The answer is simple; it is High Functioning autistics and aspies, advocating it because they want to be accepted for who they are, not rejected as freaks. Damned good point. They have every right to be offended and upset by the treatment they often receive. BUT ARE THEY SPEAKING FOR MY SON?

Read this carefully:

NO THEY BLOODY WELL ARE NOT.

There is a big difference - an enormous, fundamental difference between curing someone whose disability prevents them from understanding and adopting the social niceties of life, and curing someone whose disability leads them to smear shit all over their home, beat the crap out of their siblings, and cause sleep deprivation to the point of clinical insanity to their parents.

Autistic rights and the principle of neurodiversity expires when it imposes unreasonable demands upon other people who did not volunteer, and who have rights of their own that are rejected without any thought whatsoever.

When I read blogs like this, with comments like this:

Having an autistic child is tough and causes you to change your expectations of family life. Parents who adapt and accept this, and their children, are more likely to thrive.

then all I think of are the words “glib,” “patronising” and “bastard.”

Since when did the arrival of a disabled child mean that parents should renounce their own expectations of life and accept the priorities of their child? It doesn’t apply to parents of children with any of the other disabilities I teach - so why the fuck should autism be different?

Why? Because the service providers are ignorant, and because there are too many idiots like AFF and other ‘autism liberationist’ groups who think that their needs are best met by stamping underfoot the needs of their carers.

Wake up and smell the coffee, guys - you have a disability. It imposes burdens of care upon others that are only met by emotional bonds and goodwill. Stop taking the piss, otherwise you might find the goodwill has a short shelf life.

For the first time in 14 years of marriage, Darling Wifey and I have bought a new bed.

For the last decade and a half we have made do with hand-me-downs, second-hand bargains, and £50 discount deal mattresses. Not one of them has lasted more than a couple of years.

Our current bed was found in a flat by a friend when she moved in, and offered to us “for free” if we could pick it up before the skip she was dumping rubbish into was taken away - giving me just three hours to drive 150 miles and load it into the back of the car.

Just a couple of years down the line it is being held together by brackets and six inch screws, and the mattress we bought to put on it is like a bag of potatoes.

So enough is enough. Savings have been accumulated (aka “borrowed”) and we smartened ourselves up to go into a posh furniture store - with me receiving a lesson from Darling Wifey on the importance of accesories when shopping for expensive goods (or at least that was her excuse for taking her Radley handbag.) We ordered a very large, very sturdy king-sized and a Tempur mattress and pillows. Very soft and luxurious.

The bed will be delivered in about six weeks - but they sent us home with the orthopaedic pillows which, believe it or not, come with a sixteen page instruction book…

Darling Wifey has finally given in to my pestering and let me buy a new toy:

Not a kiddies’ toy, but a fully functional helicopter. And I was being good with it - I promise. I was following the training manual, learning the walkthroughs and everything.

Then I thought it would be fun to take it for a buzz around the garden.

No, I hadn’t mastered hovering or the set manoeuvres. But I wanted to see it fly! And instructions are for wimps, anyway.

So it’s grounded until the spare part arrives on Tuesday…

The BBC has reported this study by the IOD, which, once again, refutes the government’s claims that the education system in this country is just getting better and better all the time.

There are countless potential reasons for “grade inflation” and whether or not it reflects a genuine improvement in academic standards - and, frankly, after a decade and a half being expected to launder the emperor’s new clothes, I no longer give a stuff.

There is no point in arguing with the government about this; the government has made an art of setting the agenda by denial of information, representing whim and opinion as indisputable fact, and, most importantly, telling everyone that they not only agree with their priorities and goals, but also don’t want to be seen as ‘off message’ in case they are seen as wreckers.

The absolute and undeniable truth about the education system today is that the appearance of progress is now more important than anything else - including progress itself. And since they have sewn up all of the monitoring and research into educational standards since the establishment of OFSTED, there is no way of checking objectively whether all the government initiatives are actually improving things.

All we have is the government’s word for it. And do you trust them? Because I sure as hell don’t.