I read those Government publications about “work-life balance” and laugh. Not an “Oh, that’s funny” laugh, but one of those strange laughs that you get from the victims of slapstick humour that isn’t funny. A “Game For A Laugh” laugh.

Our Government loves those welfare initiatives that look after ordinary people in the workplace… unless the ordinary person in question works for the Government. Which is why teaching is one of the few jobs in the UK where you? are not legally entitled to regular breaks. And the fact that there is no upper limit on our workload is touted as an “advantage” of our professional status.

So a quick survey of? a staffroom during the end of term drinkies:

• teachers on antidepressants: 4 – which is sixteen times the national average, but typical of schools
• receiving medical treatment for other stress related disorders: 3 – about ten times the national average
• showing visible symptoms of sleep deprivation: 75%
• mentally, emotionally or otherwise incapable of staying at the end of term party for more than 30 minutes: 50%
• looking forward to being able to fit social activities into their lives for a few weeks: 75%

For some reason, it has become a “truth universally acknowledged” that teachers are simultaneously workshy and incompetent (hence the need to monitor, assess and evaluate them constantly, under ever-increasing pressure to improve their standards) and prepared to work themselves into a state of serious physical illness by the end of every term.

No wonder there are problems training, recruiting and retaining teachers.