First, with OFSTED approaching, a little history:

nine months after my first ever OFSTED inspection, Little Madam was born

then, eight months after my second OFSTED inspection, Little Nutter was born (one month prematurely…)

finally, nine months after my last OFSTED inspection, guess what happened?

Anyway, yesterday I was very upset. During the course of the morning I realised that I had lost my ring. A small gold signet, engraved with my initials, given to me by Darling Wifey on the day we got engaged nearly fifteen years ago. Vanished. (It was found in Little Madam’s school car park by another parent – who handed it in to the school secretary. But too late. Someone, probably me, had driven over it.)

So now, not only am I the dangerously fertile bloke who must be kept at bay for the next month, but I am also the insensitive git who doesn’t take care of gifts lovingly bestowed upon him by his unappreciated wife…