Busyknitter

Where did we go?
East Dene on the Isle of Wight

What was the deal?
Freedom Family Holidays - “the wonderful opportunity for families living with autism and related behaviours to have a relaxing holiday together in a supportive environment without judgement or discrimination”.

And how did that work?
It’s a large, rambling, shabby and comfy country house, which normally houses large groups of schoolchildren for activity holidays. But for two weeks in the summer, the place is given over to up to ten families affected by autism for a full board, semi-structured holiday. The nearest I can get to describing what it’s really like is a country house party with some very peculiar guests.

What was the accommodation like?
We got a basic room with four beds and a sink. It was the only occupied room on our corridor. The rooms were lockable from the outside and inside. You had to go down the hall for the loo or a shower (which were newly installed and very good). The organisers understand that sleep is often a big issue with autism and we were offered the use of the room next door if necessary. In fact T slept like a log right through every night but the last one, where he hardly slept at all. And as I had to be fit for the drive back to Lancashire next day, I got to slope off to the other room, leaving husband and older son holding the fort.

They also understand about the poo aspects of autism and dealt with a smearing incident in one of the corridors one day with discretion and aplomb.

The grub?
Reasonably good quality institutional catering. Big fry up every morning, packed lunches provided midday and a two-course hot meal in the evening. Older son particularly rated their sausages.

So what were the other guests like?
Ten families in all, a real mix of situations and ages; e.g.
-A family with two smallish kids, one of which seemed reasonably HF ASD
-A lady in her late sixties with her LF gentle giant of a grandson, who spent most of the holiday in either his swimming trunks or his underpants (a sign that he felt at home and at ease)
-A single mum with a teenage LF son (boistrous, but also very gentle) and a slightly younger NT boy who quickly buddied up with my own son.
-A family with four girls; two little dots of 3 and 4, who just beetled about the house all week looking incredibly at home and quite incredibly a pair of ASD identical twins, who had their own private language (mostly used to discuss the finer critical points of their favorite Thomas video)
-A family with an AS boy of 11 (very, very bright) an autistic 10-year old and an NT 9 year old.

It took no more than 48 hours for everyone to feel at home.For me meeting the other parents was one of the nicest parts of the holiday. It was also quite a learning experience, seeing at such close quarters all the different aspects of autism in both younger and older children.

We all had the run of the house, but during the day (when we weren’t out and about) we mostly inhabited two big lounges overlooking the grounds. There was a telly, a VHS and DVD. Also facilities for making tea and coffee. We also had a couple of fridges for any extra food we needed. These soon filled with wine and beer.

What did you do all day?
Well, the swimming pool was open for hours every day and everyone spent quite a bit of time there.
And each day offered different activities, all run by trained and qualified staff. We dipped into them, depending on what else we were up to and whether they appealed to us. So there was for example trampolining, archery, an organised walk, arts and crafts, giant games, a karaoke session, a campfire evening (complete with marshmallows, cocoa and singing). It was all very flexible and laid back. The whole idea was to provide a holiday that catered for every member of the family. So while your autistic 7-year old might not get much from a karaoke session, his 6 year old NT sister might just love it.

Most families also went on trips. We didn’t do much of that (too much traffic on the island to be enjoyable in our view). But we did have one very fun day, when we bought a family bus rover ticket and just spent the afternoon riding around the island on double deckers.

How secure was the site?
No more nor less secure than any standard holiday accommodation. The 10 acre site has a clear boundary, but a determined ASD escape artist would be able to just walk down the field, hop over a low fence and scamper down to the beach.

I found my range of comfort with T increased as the week went on and we all got used to the building and the grounds, but it was necessary to maintain a clear line of 1:1 supervision of him at all times.

Overall verdict
Me 8/10 - Loved the holiday, wish it was a bit nearer home (the journey back wore us out completely)
Hubby 5/10 - really appreciated the place and what they set out to achieve, but has decided that even under these circumstances that a holiday with T is no holiday at all
T - 7/10 - Loved the pool and generally coped well. Curiously didn’t like being around so many ASD kids and all their behaviours. Was very glad to get home.
S - 12/10 My older son had an absolute blast and is already begging to go back next year. This holiday worked for him on so many levels. He loved the centre and spent as much time as he could in the pool. He made a friend, which was great. He also admitted to me how much he appreciated being somewhere where he didn’t have to feel embarrassed by T.

Will you go again?
Possibly, if S still wants to go back by next Spring. But probably only me and the boys.